Ghost Story
by Lionchilde
Summary: Force Ghosts aren't the only blue glowies out there. Obi-Wan gets a helping hand from Jaga.


**Ghost Story is a crack fic. Like "Vader's Cat." It has very little to do with the canon of either franchise. It's just for laughs.  
**

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When Obi-Wan became one with the Force, he expected things to be…well…different. At the very least, he would have expected to spend a while lost in that sense of oneness with the universe. Perhaps not skating on comet tails or playing with supernovas, but…drifting. Experiencing the universe at a level beyond that which his human senses would have been capable of processing. Instead, what he found was a rather picturesque little park in which beings of all sizes and descriptions, some wearing Jedi robes but most dressed in common local garments, strolled around and seemed quite normal. Except that they all glowed. Blue.

He raised his own hand and studied it for a few moments. He was blue, too! He also seemed at least semi-solid. He considered this for a while, then he pinched the skin on the back of his hand lightly to see exactly how corporeal he still was.

"Ow!"

Other people turned to look at him. He smiled as casually as he could manage, clasped both hands behind his back, and started to walk in the opposite direction. There had to be other people he knew here. Qui-Gon. Where was Qui-Gon?

There were several paths cobblestone paths in the park, and he found that the further he went along any one of them, the stranger it became. There were plants and trees and beings the likes of which he had never even seen before. A fountain that sprayed rainbows instead of water. A fish pond with little gold and silver fish that always jumped backwards. He sat down beside the pond and watched them for some time, trying to figure out whether he was imagining things. Eventually, it occurred to him that fish weren't blue.

None of the plants and animals were blue. They didn't come in ordinary colors. Some of them _did_ glow, but it was usually a soft white or variation of whatever color they came in. None of them glowed blue.

"Why?" he mused.

"Why what?" asked a deep, slightly quavering voice to his right.

He looked up to see an old felinoid man dressed in…the oddest combination of armor and a leotard that he had ever seen. He very carefully kept himself from staring. The man had on a pointed helmet, studded wristbands, boots, and some kind of sleeveless leotard that partly covered by a long, flowing cape. The cape itself seemed to be held in place by a disc-shaped insignia that just stuck to him without any apparent means of fastening.

"I…was wondering about the fish," he said seriously.

"What about them?" the other man asked.

"Well," said Obi-Wan, stroking his beard thoughtfully. "I was wondering why they aren't blue. And why they jump backwards."

"I don't know why they jump backwards," the man said. "But they aren't blue because they aren't ghosts."

"Oh. Well, I suppose that makes sense, yes," murmured Obi-Wan.

"You're new here," the man observed.

"Just arrived," said Obi-Wan. "I was looking for my old mentor, but I got lost."

"It happens a lot," his companion said.

"Does it?" frowned Obi-Wan.

"You'll look all over and not find him until you've learned whatever it is you're supposed to be learning."

"Ah. Yes. I should have guessed," Obi-Wan said. "Tell me, are you a Jedi?"

"No, I'm a ThunderCat. My name is Jaga," the other man replied.

"It's nice to meet you, Jaga, I'm Obi-Wan Kenobi," Obi-Wan smiled.

He stood up and offered a polite bow, which Jaga returned, saying "A pleasure, Master Kenobi. Perhaps I could show you around."

"Certainly!" agreed Obi-Wan cheerfully. Having a guide seemed like a much better proposition than wandering about by himself.

Jaga nodded and began to acquaint Obi-Wan with the park, which was apparently referred to as a Paranormal Hub. It existed in a wide oval which floated like a moving island in a vast expanse of stars, planets, doorways, floating staircases, and odd streams of light that could be summoned to act as bridges between the park and other hubs.

Obi-Wan was just getting the hang of this when Jaga suddenly stood straighter, closed his eyes and pressed two fingers against his temple. The light bridge that Obi-Wan had been manipulating swung away again and reconnected with the Hub it had been touching before, and a big archway appeared in front of them.

"Jaga?" Obi-Wan asked a bit nervously. "What's that?"

"It's a doorway onto the physical plane," explained Jaga. "My old student, Lion-O, has gotten himself into trouble again."

"We can influence the physical plane?" Obi-Wan blinked. He remembered telling Luke to run just after he gave up his physical form to the Force, but he hadn't quite been gone yet then.

"Mainly with cryptic advice," Jaga said. "A little guidance here and there. Lion-O is going ot make a worse mess if I don't go, Master Kenobi. Can you manage by yourself for a while?"

"I think so," Obi-Wan nodded.

"Very well. I'll meet you tonight at the Blue Glowies Bar," Jaga said, then swept his cape around himself. His glow became brighter and spread outward to touch the doorway that was waiting for him. As he connected with it, he vanished, leaving Obi-Wan to stare in amazement.

It took him several minutes to process what the other ghost had said.

"The…Blue…Glowies…Bar…?" he repeated.

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This is a crack bunny I've had on my hard drive for a while. It's inspired by my friend Polgarawolf, and will be continued dependent on interest.


End file.
